Every once in awhile I come across a day that is not filled with deadlines, priorities or phone calls. My color coded calendar will have tasks that are mostly muted colors of grey or light blue, with nothing dramatic to catch my eye. They become a blur of suggestions for the day, not absolutes.
When you say yes, yes, yes to too many things your schedule can become overwhelming. You may find yourself feeling too busy, stressed and spending time on things that don’t speak to your heart.
Your time is a precious commodity and it is limited. Giving yourself away to a cycle of being too busy can leave you feeling trapped and exhausted, without being able to see a way out. After all, you are the one everyone depends on. Right?
This morning, my journaling started with a little grumpiness about a few minor things going on in my life before shifting into gratitude and appreciation. As I wrote from my heart about what I was grateful for I had a realization.
The life I am living now was in many ways one I would have called a dream in my earlier years. I decided to play with this idea and write a vision for the years to come from the perspective of my 40ish self. It included things like:
I was talking to a client last night about living his values and he brought up a code he was taught when taking karate lessons as a kid. It reminded me of when I created a program for teenage girls called, Living as a Samurai. A big part of that experience was to create their own Samurai code to live by.
Honor codes have been around for years, but in my generation they were mostly in the world of men. They are common in martial arts, the military and sports. Some businesses have them too, but they might call them something else.
These codes of honor can support us in feeling stronger within ourselves and committed to how we want to live our lives. Using them as a guide can reduce stress, bring clarity, make decisions easier and help us stay focused on living as our best selves.
Your brain loves the number three.
For one thing, it can only hold about 3 things in your short term memory at a time. The number 3 is also the lowest figure that can create patterns in your mind – and your brain loves patterns.
Productivity experts rave about doing things in threes. Keeping things limited to this amount allows for greater focus without overwhelm. That sounds good to me.
In our modern world we are faced with decisions all day long. Some big, some small.
What should I put in my coffee?
What should I wear?
Should I quit my job?
With the bigger questions it is easy to get caught in a thought loop with our mind spinning on pros and cons and never landing anywhere. Often, the information it provides is conflicting and confusing.
We are always thinking something. More often than not, those thoughts can be negative. We can get so used to them running in the background of our minds that they feel normal and we simply accept how they make us feel.
Thoughts are just thoughts, not who you are, and you have control over them. That means that you can audit them and choose ones that serve you better.
Here are some simple ways to shift your thoughts so that you can think and feel more positive.
Not many people know that I was once an AFAA certified personal trainer. This was back in the days when fitness training was a new thing. I didn’t plan on helping people exercise, I just wanted to learn. And, I learned a lot.
I feel pretty strongly about keeping commitments I make. Maybe too strong. Maybe even to the point of being rigid.
This morning I had an appointment to pick up groceries in a city about half an hour away from my house. They have a bigger selection than the local store and bring my online order out to my car, so it’s contact free shopping. It feels worth the drive every other week.
It is commonly said (even by me) that our thoughts create our feelings. While it is true that what we think impacts our moods there are other ways to influence how we feel.
Your mind and body share energy and work together. When they are aligned toward something positive is when you feel your best. When they aren’t, you can use one to influence the other.
Well, it’s been quite a year. I know my head is still spinning and will probably continue to for awhile. With all that has happened and all that is still going on, doing an end of the year process is even more important this year.
So, pick up your pens or tablets or whatever you choose to use and let’s get writing.
While 2020 may have been full of loss and distress, remember we are always learning from our experiences and there is always something to be grateful for.
Use these prompts to guide you as you remember the good and the bad and say goodbye to 2020. It doesn’t matter if you write lists, paragraphs, or even a letter to the year. Just write from your heart.
What were the blessings and magical moments I experienced this year?
What successes did I achieve?
What am I proud of myself for?
What surprised me?
What did I learn from this year’s challenges?
What did I worry about and how did it turn out?
What do I want to take from this year to create a foundation for the year to come?
What do I want to leave behind? (physical, mental, or emotional)
What am I most grateful for? Write at least 100 things.
May you have a wonderful New Year holiday that brings closure to the past year and prepares you for a great year to come.
Related Posts:
Accepting the Truth will Set You Free
Create a Comfort Box for When You Feel Low
May your holidays be merry and bright!
Life is truly unpredictable and it can be fun to look back and realize how little we knew about how our lives would play out and who we would become.
For instance, I never imagined:
I’ve had my ups and downs with buying online during all this Covid-19 stuff. I spend more time online and am exposed to more nudges to buy things. It’s amazing how I can feel I have to have something based on an ad or article I’ve read. Scary too.
There are 3 simple things I do that help me buy less and not get caught up in the gotta have it moments.
Sometimes I think I’m an expert at creating negative fantasies. They may be about someone doing me wrong, my house burning down, a car accident, a fight with someone I care about or any number of things. The one thing they all have in common is that they make me feel sad, depressed or bad about myself.
Living a heartfelt life is one of the most peaceful and joyful ways to experience this world. It’s pretty much the opposite of what we see around us. Most people are too busy, too worried, and completely disconnected from their heart’s wisdom.
Once you start experiencing heartfelt moments you will crave them more and more. But, how is it possible to shape your entire life around them? It’s not as hard as you think and when you do it will feel like coming home to the life you were meant to live.
With all of the things going on in our world today, most of us are experiencing an increase in anxiety. I know I am. My clients are talking about it too.
I’ve been a little hard on myself lately. Since I moved to Missouri, I have learned to respect the seasons and the sometimes short windows of opportunity for outdoor upgrades and home maintenance. I start each spring with to do lists and somehow they never seems to get done.
We are all likely to be experiencing some level of grief today. The loss of jobs, relationships, and way of life due to Covid-19 can all bring deep sadness.
Many of the people I talk to have also recently lost friends or loved ones and are struggling with how to master the art of grieving. The death of someone we love is probably the deepest level of grief we can experience.
I know because I’ve been there.
When I was young I could eat whatever I wanted and not gain weight so I’ve never been much of a dieter. Even so, I did fall for the low fat craze and actually believed low fat twinkies were real food. I sure ate a lot of them.
Once I hit my 50’s my body began to change and even though I walk regularly I was adding extra pounds. My move from CA to Missouri complicated things even more and I soon found myself 20 pounds over weight. I have since lost half of that and am working on the rest.