I’ve been a little hard on myself lately. Since I moved to Missouri, I have learned to respect the seasons and the sometimes short windows of opportunity for outdoor upgrades and home maintenance. I start each spring with to do lists and somehow they never seems to get done.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve accomplished a lot this year. I pulled carpet out of a couple rooms and cleaned up the original wood flooring. I created a flower bed in the front yard, painted the front porch rails, and of course, weeded and mowed (a lot).
But there is still a big outdoor project looming and I’m not sure I will get it done this year. It’s the back deck. I thought I would just pressure wash it and re-stain it, but that didn’t go as planned. I’ve washed it and sanded areas and there is still old stain peeling up. It appears I need to completely strip it. Ugh!
I’m telling you this story because I didn’t handle the situation well. My thoughts were all about shoulds, deadlines and rigid expectations. When it started to look like the project might not get crossed off the to do list, it felt like I was failing.
I know better than this, but fell into the trap anyway. As I tell my clients, the true measure of growth is how long it takes us to turn things around. I’m doing that now. And, in that process, I’ve come up with a few things I would like to share with you.
Think of your to do lists as menus – not everything on it is a must do or needs a rigid deadline.
Acceptance is the key to peaceful living – you can’t fight reality
You can always shift your priorities – I found that after hitting several roadblocks on a tough project it always helped to do something I knew would go more smoothly.
Remember what you have already accomplished – while getting an appraisal for a refi I was asked to provide a list of updates to my home since I moved in. This really helped me refresh my perspective and feel good about everything I HAD completed.
Always, always, always be gentle with yourself
To Do Lists can be wonderful tools or weapons we use against ourselves. If you find yourself stressed, disappointed, or under pressure when you look at yours, it may be time to shift your perspective.
If you are interested in the support of a professional coach as you go through life challenges, improve your relationship with yourself or create something new in your life, I would love to talk to you. You can contact me here.
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