The holiday season can be pretty crazy with gifts to buy, food to make, and events to attend. Sometimes they can keep you so busy that you never quite get into the feeling of what the holidays should be. When that happens, try one of these ideas to bring some sanity into this time of year. Continue reading
While most of my coaching happens with clients over a period of time, there are some things that can be handled more quickly. You may have specific questions, be unable to afford ongoing coaching, or just want an hour of compassionate support.
I want to be able to serve you, too.
Things move pretty fast in our world these days and that means we are moving fast too. In order to keep up we may feel we have to act and respond quickly to what is before us. And, that can be a problem.
We end up reacting to what is happening in the moment. We react instead of respond, and we do it without taking time to check within for what we really, really, really want.
In the 8 years since I moved from CA I have lived in two houses, weathered a pandemic, adopted a dog and become a great-grandmother. Life is keeping me busy.
To honor the anniversary of my move, I thought it might be nice to share the series of posts I wrote about it all in one place.
I’ve coached several people looking to make a similar change and I know there are many more who are considering it. This story can help you know if a this type of move is right for you.
It’s also an opportunity to share about the small town that welcomed me and that I’ve grown to love.
So here they are. I hope you enjoy them and if there is someone you know who is considering a similar move, please pass this post on to them. It may help.
There is still a lot of confusion about what life coaches do. Even coaches have trouble explaining it. And, everyone seems to be a coach these days. How confusing is that?
In general, a professionally qualified life coach will listen carefully and provide support, perspective, guidance, tools, motivation, accountability, and champion you in creating what you want in life.
Most clients work with a life coach because they: Continue reading
I think we can all agree that our lives today are full of distractions. We are so busy doing that we lose touch with our ability to just be. It leaves us living surface level, task oriented lives instead of being able to savor the moments we are given.
Money is one of those subjects that can bring out the best and the worst in us. It can be seductive, shameful, and trigger all of our emotional “stuff” more than just about anything in life.
Fear is one of the most common things my clients talk about when the subject of money comes up. Sometimes it’s warranted, but even when doing well many are haunted by images of becoming bag ladies living on the street.
It’s so easy to get caught up in the drama, reacting to what is happening and feeling like you need to defend or protect yourself. The story of what is happening may even become amplified in your mind when it triggers fears, pain or echoes a past negative experience. But, the extra upset you create only hurts you and keeps you distracted from resolution.
Resolving things that feel upsetting happens best when you can be in a calm and rational state. When your energy is neutral you can be more thoughtful, open and find solutions for the issue at hand. Easier said then done. Right?
Keep in mind – It’s how you relate to the issue that matters most.
When we are grounded, we feel centered, strong, aligned, and connected to our inner wisdom. It brings a calm confidence that empowers us and allows us to operate as our best selves.
Life can sometimes unsettle us and pull us from our natural grounded state. When it does this, we may notice that we are not feeling or doing our best. Everything may seem harder and our inner resources can be depleted.
There was a time in my life when I felt like I couldn’t even remember who I was. After years where I survived scary things as a child, was in an abusive relationship, grieved a man I loved and pushed myself to the limits as a single mom I was exhausted. I just put one foot in front of the other and never even considered there might be more to life.
As a coach, I talk to women experiencing the same thing almost every day. Sometimes it’s a life transition like menopause or an empty nest that helps them realize there are better things than what they are experiencing. And sometimes their soul calls out to them asking for change. Whatever the catalyst is, they begin to realize that there is hope, they can make choices and in order to thrive they need to listen to the calling of their heart.
Decision fatigue comes when we find ourselves having to evaluate and make choices over and over again. We make more decisions in one day than previous generations ever had to and to be honest it can be quite tiring.
Many of the choices we make each day are the same ones we made the day before. What to eat. What to wear. When to go to bed. What if there was a way to simplify the number of daily decisions and leave more space in our brains for other, more important things?
The period of completion after an uncomfortable experience is not just about resolution, it is also a time of transition. When we seek closure, what we really want is an understanding of what has happened and an opportunity to integrate the lessons we have learned. Continue reading
When clients first start working with me they are often feeling overwhelmed, upset, or out of balance. Many of them have forgotten who they really are, judging themselves on the basis of:
Recently, I was having dinner with my family when something said triggered a memory and I started crying. Everyone was surprised, especially me. The last time my family saw me cry was 6 years ago when I thought I lost my cat while moving. These tears seemed out of the blue.
I like to believe that I have resolved and healed the experiences from my past, and mostly I have. The time and energy I have put into healing and evolving has paid off, but I doubt anyone ever does it perfectly. There are different angles, remnants and nuances that can still be triggered and set off our emotions. Not as many, but there are usually some.
I don’t have the bumper sticker, but I am one of those people who brakes for garage sales. Hunting for hidden treasures is something I have always enjoyed. It probably goes back to my roots of wearing thrift store clothes as a kid and how much fun it was to find something I loved.
In more recent years I’ve become more selective about what I buy and often come home empty handed. What I enjoy now is looking and visiting with the people there. My dog Daisy loves to join me on these adventures and is pretty good at soliciting lots of pets and attention.
We all have our moments of sadness, whether they are based on something that happened or seem to just show up for no reason. For many of us, these sad moments can keep piling up, leading to long term low moods or even depression.
We can feel helpless when that happens.
But, we don’t have to if we remember these 3 things:
Have you ever noticed that as people get older they become more entrenched in the way they view the world? I remember one woman I met while volunteering at an Alzheimer’s facility. She was always smiling and would get really excited about simple things like a game of Bingo. Her positive mindset was helping her stay happy and enjoy better moods during a challenging time of her life.
And then, I remember my dad. He would complain endlessly about people who he felt took advantage of him or what was wrong with the world. Visiting him meant listening to much repeated stories of things that had gone wrong in his life. He was angry, hateful and sad and I always felt drained after visiting him.
Both of these people had chosen a way of thinking that programmed their brains year after year until they were living fully in the mindsets they created.
I’ve been at this life coaching thing for awhile. Twenty years to be exact. And, in that time I have experienced many amazing moments, witnessed miracles and felt sure I was doing what I am meant to do.
My life has been blessed by this career choice in many ways. My work is flexible and supports me well. It transitioned easily when I moved cross country and because most of my sessions are by phone, I can work from anywhere, wearing whatever I want.
Being a Life Coach has allowed me to study a variety of interesting subjects each year and call it working. It doesn’t hurt that they can be claimed as tax deductions too. My studies have taken me from emotional healing, brain hacks, fearless living, quieting the mind, shifting limiting beliefs, and more. The high point was a master’s program in spiritual psychology. Along the way I met many amazing people traveling a similar path as mine who continue to be my friends today.
I’m often drawn to people who have a sense of quiet confidence and serenity about them. They seem to move through the world differently, like there is a river of strength, capability and peace running through them.
I want to be more like that.
And, I wouldn’t be surprised if you did too.
Whenever we grow or heal or improve ourselves we move closer to this sense of strength and peace within. Serenity is our natural state and the things that keep us in stress, anxiety and overwhelm are simply covering it up. The path to deep serenity is one of loving ourselves and letting go of what no longer serves us. It is a lifelong journey.
While we travel this healing journey toward peace, we also find ourselves craving serenity in our daily lives. Every time we listen to that call and focus on a more peaceful way of being we take one step closer to our authentic serene selves.
I’ve recently returned to the practice of journaling gratitude at the end of each day. I was feeling off center and a bit ungrounded and this is something that has worked for me in the past. It has been one of my favorite practices since Oprah talked about it decades ago and recent studies have shown it improves mood and well-being.