Sometimes, even the words “to do list” can bring up feelings of dread. These lists often symbolize what we see as failures, incompletions, and expectations not met. But is that really true? It’s possible we might be looking at to do lists all wrong.
How we perceive things impacts our experience of them and sometimes our perception about these lists is not the truth of what they really are.
To do lists are simply tools for remembering and organizing things we want to do.
They are not:
- Unmet expectations
- Reasons to judge ourselves
- Overwhelming lists of things that need to be done NOW
It’s when we look at our lists and see impossible expectations or evidence of our failure to get things done that we want to avoid them.
New Ways to Look at Your to Do List
Remember that to do lists are an ongoing journey. Most are designed to be evergreen and serve us over long periods of time. New items will be added and others completed, but there is no end to achieve or judge yourself for not reaching.
Consider seeing them as menus instead of lists. Menus are about options and choices and giving yourself freedom in how you move forward. This simple shift in perception can influence your brain to feel more positive and use your menus/lists more effectively.
How to Make Your Lists/Menus More Friendly
Consider creating multiple lists. This will help things feel more effective and less overwhelming. Many people like to have sub lists and move items from there to a main to do list when the time feels right. Common sub lists or menus my clients use include:
- Projects
- Priorities
- Next Steps
- Some Day
- Lists for specific projects with multiple steps
Keep the steps simple. Studies show that we are more likely to move things forward when we take small steps and build a pattern of success. If you have larger or more general items on your list, this would mean breaking them down into smaller steps and then adding the smaller items to your to do list or menu individually.
Think in threes. The human brain loves the number three, and you can use that to your advantage. Choose 3 items for each project to move to your main to do list, focus on 3 priorities at a time or choose 3 actions to take each day. This will help prevent overwhelm and keep you on track toward your goals.
Set a clear and positive intention. Intentions are more flexible and open than specific goals and allow for times when something real gets in the way of doing what you planned. The intention I use is: “I intend to create daily forward momentum that is aligned with my dreams, values and goals.” This intention allows me to focus on the forward momentum rather than the specifics where priorities may shift. Your intention may be different, or you may prefer goals. There is no wrong way and you get to choose.
In the end, it’s about remembering your to do list can be your friend or your foe.
Which will you choose?
If you would like the support of a professional, experienced life coach as you create what you want in your world, you can reach out to me here.
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