I feel pretty strongly about keeping commitments I make. Maybe too strong. Maybe even to the point of being rigid.
This morning I had an appointment to pick up groceries in a city about half an hour away from my house. They have a bigger selection than the local store and bring my online order out to my car, so it’s contact free shopping. It feels worth the drive every other week.
This morning it was snowing. Not a snow storm. Just consistent snowing. Everything was covered in white and while it was beautiful, it made me a little nervous about driving.
But, I had made a commitment.
I went out early and started the car to warm it up and defrost the windows. Ten minutes later I was out in the cold brushing and scraping snow off the car. It is one of my least favorite things to do and somehow most of the snow always seems to land on me. My feet were cold. My hands were cold. And, my hair was going a bit wild.
Eventually, the car was ready to go. It’s been about 4 years since I moved to Missouri, but I’ve been able to mostly avoid driving in bad weather since I work from home. Most of my Missouri friends might read this post and think it’s funny that I let a little snow get to me, but I don’t have a lot of experience driving in it.
At the end of the first street my car was slipping and sliding as I made a left turn, but I handled it well. The same thing happened as I turned on the next road to the highway. Everything was white and it was hard to see. The radio was saying stay off the roads and talking about a multi-car accident.
But, I needed to keep my commitment.
And then, two things happened. My windows started to fog up and ice started freezing to the outside of the window so the windshield wipers were having trouble working. I was pretty sure that they would stop long before I reached my destination.
So, I broke my commitment. I turned around and came home.
It was the right thing to do.
When I called the store they were more than understanding. She said they anticipated most people weren’t going to make it today and would simply hold my groceries for me until tomorrow. It wasn’t that big of a deal.
It may be time for me to lighten up on this whole keeping commitments thing. I can see how rigid, stubborn and determined I was to be there no matter what. What’s up with that? And, where else in my life am I this way?
It’s humbling to realize how tight I can be sometimes. My intention for the future is to flow with things as they come, realizing that circumstances can change.
The world won’t come to an end if I don’t keep a commitment.
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