Most everyone is familiar with the value of having a To Do list where you keep track of the projects and actions you intend to take. But, have you ever considered creating a Don’t Do list? Continue reading
Authentic Living – Being Yourself
Too Busy? It’s Time to Spring Clean Your Schedule
One of the common concerns that my clients talk about is not having enough time. They are working very hard and feeling very, very busy. We often discover that they are operating in a time warp that is not based in reality.
Here is a process that will help you evaluate your relationship with time and begin to use it wisely:
1. Start by exploring and writing down what you value most in life. Common core values include things like family, success, happiness, service, inner peace, religious beliefs, or love. (Contact me if you would like a free list of sample values to work with.)
2. Make a list of all of the things that you spend time on or that call for your attention. (Appointments, meetings, things you do for your children, work, connecting with others, playing on Facebook, watching TV, organizations you belong to, housework, and more) When it feels complete, take a moment to look over your list. How does it make you feel?
3. Now, for the fun part. Cross off everything on the list. Everything! (Do it in a way that you can still see what was written beneath.) You do not “have to” do any of these things. Take a moment to absorb this. It’s a clean sweep. There is nothing left on your schedule or to do list.
4. Set an intention for creating a stress-free schedule that will serve you and your life.
5. Create a new list that only includes things that are in alignment with your values and supports the life you want to create. Be careful not to add everything back. This is your priority list. Everything else is an option to plug in only if it feels meaningful, is in alignment, and you have plenty of time. There is one exception. If you have not included time for yourself on the list, please add it now.
6. Double check the list for illusions like the ones below:
- Keeping you and your children busy with multiple after school activities may seem in alignment with your family values, but could really be limiting your special times together.
- Spending a lot of time working on a website or marketing in social media may seem like a necessary use of your time, but it could be preventing you from getting out and connecting with potential clients.
7. Review your new list. It should be much, much shorter than the original and feel in alignment with who you are and what you want. It should feel more peaceful and leave space for spontaneity and magic.
8. Plug your new list into your schedule.
Now, doesn’t that feel better?
Don’t forget to leave a comment. I would love to hear from you.
Stop Fighting Your Negative Thoughts and Do This Instead
You know that negative thoughts are unhealthy. Dangerous too. They keep you spinning in a false world so that you miss your real life. They re-wire your brain and personality. Steal your hope. And, energetically set you up for making them come true.
After awhile, negative thinking becomes a habit, maybe even an addiction.
When you decide you want to change, you label these thoughts as bad. You judge them. Resist them. Fight with them. And, this battle only feeds them more.
And then, you judge yourself. Or, just give up.
There is another way. A more loving way.
Simply return to the present moment and align your head with your heart.
This is how you do it:
- Take a deep breath.
- Bring to mind something that warms your heart, like a loved one, cute puppy, baby, or something you are grateful for. Focus on it. Feel it. Savor it.
- Repeat as necessary.
At first you may need to repeat this often, but eventually it becomes your new habit.
A few tips:
- Using the same image for something that warms your heart each time creates an anchor to the present moment and an eventual short cut to get there.
- If negative thoughts try to interrupt the process, don’t resist them. Just let them gently float away.
- Be gentle and loving with yourself as you create this new way of being
Aligning your head and heart in the present moment opens the door to true internal peace and personal power.
What could be better than that?
How to Clear Out Your Wardrobe When You Don’t Want to Let Anything Go
With the change of seasons (not that it is very noticeable here in CA), I decided to pull out my winter clothes and see what I could piece together for my cool weather wardrobe.
I have to admit that while I am not a big shopper, I do like getting a good deal. This has resulted in my having a hodgepodge of clothes, many of which do not go together. It is challenging for me to clear some of them out because they are nice and might fit with something new I pick up in the future. So, even though I don’t have a ton of clothes there is a sense of chaos.
What I want is a closet with nice, well made clothes that go together. I want to open it and see a few complete outfits as my choices for each day.
And then, all I have to do each morning is ask them, “Who wants to come out and play?
This weekend I tried to tackle the project of clearing my closet. I must not have been in the right mood for it because I kept putting back things that had been placed in the donate pile. Instead of pushing myself, I simply accepted where I was at and chose an easier process that might work for you as well.
- I discarded anything stained or damaged. My two cats have a habit of putting holes in my clothes when they do that pawing thing before laying in my lap and I’m not really a fan of the shredded bag lady look.
- I stashed summer clothing and things I was pretty sure I wouldn’t be wearing for a while in the back of the closet where they would be out of my line of vision.
- I put together a few outfits for casual, business, and exercise/lounging with what remained and gave them center stage with lots of empty space around them.
- I then turned all of the hangers for this season’s clothing backwards. When things are worn and laundered they will be hung the normal direction. In a couple weeks it will be easy to see what I truly enjoy wearing.
My closet looks much better and the chaotic feeling is gone. My choices are more clear each day and I am only wearing things I feel good in. It feels very peaceful to have a simple wardrobe, even when I haven’t cleared it all out.
My intention is to return to this project for phase 2 in a couple weeks and move out all those items that I am not really wearing. The experience of enjoying a simple organized wardrobe will make those choices much easier.
How Do You Compare?
Whether it be out of a sense of competition or trying to fit in, comparing keeps you in a game that you just can’t win. There will always be someone you can perceive as higher or better or lower than you. And, your data will be corrupt as you compare your raw, judged self to the images other people put forward of who they want you to believe they are. Continue reading