It’s easy to get upset in our interactions with others. They can say things we take wrong or even intend to hurt us. On the flip side, we can feel bad if we unintentionally hurt someone else or feel misunderstood.
These are signs that we are taking things personally.
I was talking to a client last night about living his values and he brought up a code he was taught when taking karate lessons as a kid. It reminded me of when I created a program for teenage girls called, Living as a Samurai. A big part of that experience was to create their own Samurai code to live by.
Honor codes have been around for years, but in my generation they were mostly in the world of men. They are common in martial arts, the military and sports. Some businesses have them too, but they might call them something else.
These codes of honor can support us in feeling stronger within ourselves and committed to how we want to live our lives. Using them as a guide can reduce stress, bring clarity, make decisions easier and help us stay focused on living as our best selves.
One of my intentions for this year is to be impeccable with my word. I borrowed the phrase from Don Miguel Ruiz because he uses it in a comprehensive way. To me, it means:
Well, I kind of slipped. There was a situation in my life that was upsetting me. When I spoke with the person I chose to confide in, even though I was only sharing the truth, it felt like complaining. Maybe, even whining.
The tone of my voice grated on my nerves, and probably on the nerves of my friend, too. The real problem is that the story kept running circles in my head creating an endless loop of negativity. My mood and attitude spiraled downward.
Fortunately, I was able to catch myself and shift my thinking. And now, I have renewed my commitment to this intention of impeccability with the words I think and speak.
It feels so good.
For those of you who are curious, this intention was inspired by the book, “The Four Agreements”, by Don Miguel Ruiz.