For some of us, including me, saying “no” can be challenging. We want to help and please, sometimes to our own detriment. I personally believe that most of us are way to busy these days and not honoring the time and space needed for ourselves to stay grounded and whole.
It’s important to be clear when enough is enough for you and honor those boundaries. And so, I thought I would share 50 ways that we can say no in a graceful and respectful way.
But first, I have a some tips that will help you say no successfully: Continue reading
Every day is a gift. A blank slate to write on. The choices you make in the first moments after waking up can impact your energy, effectiveness, and mood for the entire day. I am a big fan of morning practices and encourage you to create one of your own.
Here are some fun ideas for starting your morning off right: Continue reading
My simple summer wardrobe. Jeans and shorts are on the shelf above.
I had a lot of clothes. Many of them didn’t fit or seem to go with anything else in my closet.
Can you relate?
I’ve never been a big shopper, but my passion for finding deals tripped me up. Instead of having nice outfits to wear, I had a bunch of budget clothing misfits and a lot of closet clutter. Continue reading
I am not a lover of clutter. It seems the older I get the more stuffocated I feel when things start to add up. I crave space, breathing room, and love knowing exactly where everything is. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not the best house keeper or anywhere near OCD, but opening a closet or cupboard and being able to see each item clearly with plenty of empty space feels peaceful to me. Continue reading
When people hear that I choose to live simply they shake their heads and say they could never survive a simple life. In their minds they are picturing life in a cabin with one chair, one plate, and one fork. Or, a house that is cold, colorless, empty, and devoid of personality. And then, they imagine having to wear old, worn, and frumpy thrift store clothes, maybe even pioneer dresses. To them simple living sounds down right miserable.
But, the truth is, it’s nothing like that at all. Continue reading
I have always been amazed by the trees along the fence line of my yard. They managed to persevere and shape themselves around the obstacles in their way as they grew.
Many of them have chain link fence that goes right through them. Others have poles or pieces of brick integrated into them in odd places. Continue reading
(I first wrote this in January 2015 and came across it today. The words and intentions I shared feel even more powerful now as I am about to turn 63. It’s time to re-commit and share them again.)
There are a lot of goals and resolutions set at this time of year about what we want to do or accomplish. While I am playing with some of the doing stuff, I felt more called to look at how I want to be and show up in this world. Continue reading
It’s almost like we are running a race. I hear over and over again from my clients and friends that they are struggling to keep up with the speed of life. I feel it, too.
When we are racing through our days we lose the guidance of our hearts and are more likely to make unconscious choices that do not serve us well. Continue reading
This week is the one year anniversary of my moving from a busy city in Southern California to a rural small town in Missouri.
My intention was to live a more simple life and be close to my 3 grandchildren. After 62 years as a SoCal girl I anticipated some culture shock and knew I had a lot to learn about my new way of life.
Looking back over this first year I feel that I have done well, but am also aware that I am in a process that will take some time. Continue reading
One of my clients the other day was experiencing a lot of regret for how a past relationship ended. She felt guilty that she hadn’t tried harder and hurt the other person involved. The guilt she felt was eating her up from the inside out and impacting how she approached her current relationship, possibly putting it at risk. Continue reading
Many of my clients when they first come to me lead chaotic lives. They are usually on the run, can’t find things when they need them, and often seem to live being tossed from one drama to the next. Their lives are full of anxiety, stress, and unhappiness.
When I suggest bringing a sense of order to their lives, they often resist. It’s too hard! They don’t have the time! And, they feel that if they slow down for a minute all the things they are juggling will fall at once. But, they trust me and usually give it a try, only to find that order brings them peace and allows them to be more effective in the end.
You don’t need to be stressed or anxious to benefit from bringing more order and harmony into your life. We can all appreciate the peace and contentment it brings. When we feel peaceful our lives flow more naturally and we gain a sense of freedom. Continue reading
Some of my clients are shorter than me, but only because they are kids. We talk about things like developing their own code of honor, strategies for school, and family issues. I’m often surprised though, about the level of worry and anxiety they are experiencing at such a young age and am grateful I can help them.
Coaching kids can be rewarding and fun. They are curious, engaged, and open to new ideas. They also challenge me to keep things simple and create metaphors that help them remember.
It occurred to me that we adults can benefit from these simple metaphors and perspectives, too. So, here is my child’s version of talking about worry and the fear it creates. Continue reading
It’s hard to believe I have been here in small town Missouri for 7 months. It feels like I was in a fog the first 3 or 4 trying to get settled in. There were things to learn about yard care, what is available in town, updates to the house, and my initiation into the culture of small town football.
Being near my family has been a blessing and they also keep me pretty busy. I love the time I get to spend with them and never take it for granted.
My first real winter is almost over. Continue reading
Have you ever had little things on your calendar or to do list that you kept putting off?
I know I do. I could be an expert at it. It’s a shame I can’t get paid for it. Continue reading
Don’t get me wrong. I love my new life here in small town Missouri, but it hasn’t always been a smooth ride.
Several months ago I fell while out for a walk and hurt my arm. I could hardly move for a couple of days and then settled into a long journey of healing. There were many limitations to what I could do for what felt like a very, very long time.
Last month I caught the flu, or should I say it caught me. There must be something about these Missouri bugs because I didn’t get get sick in California, at least not for a long time. This flu knocked me down and it took several weeks to start feeling well again.
Add to that some plumbing problems and all of those little things called life and it feels like I got off track. Really off track… Continue reading
I’ve spent some time on Quora answering questions about life for readers and thought it might be fun to share some of the answers here. Maybe you have some of the same questions.
I may start doing this as a regular feature and welcome your questions for future posts. You can email me or contact me through my website to ask what is on your mind. In the meantime, here are some of my answers: Continue reading
For years I was a single mom. My son and I would consider bean burritos at Taco Bell a big night out. I learned to be thrifty out of necessity and now that I am in my 60’s and still wanting to save money for my future, those lessons continue to serve me well.
Some might say I’m cheap, but others like minimalists, extreme couponers, or the guy who writes the blog: Things I Find in the Trash, might think I live extravagantly. I feel like I have found a nice balance between enjoying life and protecting my finances at the same time. That doesn’t mean that I don’t have the same money fears that plague most of us. Continue reading
I believe that it is important to review and close out the year that is ending to learn all that we can from it. This simple year end process also opens the door to a deeper understanding for heartfelt intentions you want to set for the New Year.
I encourage you to find quiet time and a snugly place to curl up with pen and paper and ask yourself these questions: Continue reading
My son started celebrating Christmas early this year, trying to convince people to “Get Their Christmas On” long before Thanksgiving. At first I thought he was crazy, but then I could see how happy he became with this new focus on the holidays and their meaning. Continue reading
I do not have the benefit of family nearby to spend my Thanksgiving with, but don’t feel bad for me. I have a nice long visit with my loved ones coming up. I also have invitations for breakfast and dinners with other Thanksgiving misfits. And, sometimes I choose to spend this special holiday alone as a restful, self-nurturing day.
Whatever my day looks like, there are a couple Thanksgiving practices I never miss that fill my heart and feed my soul. I feel more grounded in the meaning of the holiday because of them. You might enjoy them, too. Continue reading