Watch Your Language – Your Words are Hypnotizing You

words hypnotizing yourself hypnotize you

It has been clear to me for a long time that the words we use impact our feelings and actions.  I write about it, coach it, and practice re-framing limiting language in my own life.  But, studying to become a Certified Hypnotherapist brought my understanding to a whole new level. Continue reading

12 Morning Practices that Start Your Day Off Right

morning practices coffee and journal

Every day is a gift.  A blank slate to write on. The choices you make in the first moments after waking up can impact your energy, effectiveness, and mood for the entire day.  I am a big fan of morning practices and encourage you to create one of your own.

Here are some fun ideas for starting your morning off right: Continue reading

How to Create a More Happy and Positive Life

positive life positive woman with pompoms

We all have our ups and downs, but some of us have more of a roller coaster ride through life than others. While there is little you can do to influence events that happen outside of you, there are many ways you can shift how you feel and create a more positive life.

Here are some of my favorites: Continue reading

Fantasies and Daydreams – Rehearsing for Your Future

 

woman excited to reach dreams fantasies

An early teacher of mine on my personal growth journey, Kendrick Mercer, used to say that fantasies were good for us. His perspective was that daydreams and fantasies were how we rehearsed for our future reality. Continue reading

A 5 Step Process for Overcoming Life Challenges

angel sculpture for life challenges

Life challenges of any size can cause us to be reactive and clutter our mind with dis-empowering thoughts. Sometimes, we feel like we can’t even think at all, even though these are the most important times to see things clearly and respond wisely.

The following steps are ones I created for my clients and myself to focus on when we face life challenges. They have worked well for us and I hope they will prove valuable for you, too. Continue reading

Living in Alignment with Your Values

hearts representing values

We are happiest when our lives are in alignment with our core values.  Living this way nurtures what is most meaningful to us and allows us to feel more peaceful, grounded, and fulfilled. Anything that conflicts with our values will create more stress and dissonance in our lives. Continue reading

25 Ways to Stay Positive in Trying Times

happy little girl under umbrella stay positive

Life gets rough at times. You may be experiencing personal challenges, surrounded by negative people, or inundated with bad news, but that doesn’t mean you need to let it get you down.

As I write this, our country and our world are full of conflict. People against people. Religion against religion. And, politics as a free for all.  It breaks my heart that words like “hatred” are part of our everyday news. It’s hard to stay positive with so much ugliness going on. Continue reading

Your Mind is a Playground Full of Infinite Possibilities

girl on swing and her mind is a playground

Imagine being a child again and going to the world’s biggest playground. There is an unlimited supply of high flying swings, exhilarating slides, and magical merry go rounds. Everything you could possibly want is in front of you.

Our minds are just like that playground. Continue reading

3 Steps for Letting Go of Guilt and Regrets

guilt guilty dog with teddy bear

One of my clients the other day was experiencing a lot of regret for how a past relationship ended. She felt guilty that she hadn’t tried harder and hurt the other person involved. The guilt she felt was eating her up from the inside out and impacting how she approached her current relationship, possibly putting it at risk.  Continue reading

5 Bad Mood Busters that Will Help You Feel Better Fast

bad mood clown doll

I don’t think anyone gets out of this life without times when they feel low on energy, high on stress, or just not ready to face the world. The good news is that you don’t have to let a bad mood control or disempower you. At least, not before trying these Bad Mood Busters: Continue reading

Magic Words that Can Make Anything Seem Possible

magic words sunflower anything possible

Do you believe in magic? What about magic words?

I know I do, because I have witnessed how our words can either empower us or keep us stuck.

Even when we remove the obvious ones from our vocabulary like can’t, won’t, don’t, should, or shouldn’t, there are other sneaky ways our language can limit us. Continue reading

My 7 Step Plan for Overcoming Social Anxiety

nervousness social anxiety girl

I have always been a nervous person. This may surprise some of you, because I have worked hard on it and usually seem pretty easy going and calm. But, it’s true.

One of the things that scares me the most is people. Other human beings.

Kind of crazy, isn’t it? Continue reading

A Totally Free Way to Feel Better Instantly

 

feel better with positive body language

One day in my class as a student of spiritual psychology at USM, a teacher asked if anyone in the room of about 300 people was feeling tired or depressed. A surprising number of people raised their hands.

One of them, a young woman, shared that she had felt depressed for a long time and had very little energy. She agreed to participate in an experiment that could help her feel better. Continue reading

The Simple Truth about Fear, Worry, and Anxiety

child afraid fear worry

Some of my clients are shorter than me, but only because they are kids. We talk about things like developing their own code of honor, strategies for school, and family issues. I’m often surprised though, about the level of worry and anxiety they are experiencing at such a young age and am grateful I can help them.

Coaching kids can be rewarding and fun. They are curious, engaged, and open to new ideas. They also challenge me to keep things simple and create metaphors that help them remember.

It occurred to me that we adults can benefit from these simple metaphors and perspectives, too. So, here is my child’s version of talking about worry and the fear it creates. Continue reading

Transform Your Anger, Pain, and Fear Into Something Meaningful

 

anger pain fear upset child lifecoachlinda.com

We all have emotional responses in life that do not serve us well.

  • Anger that leads us to say and do things we regret
  • Fear that keeps us from stepping into our true potential
  • Emotional pain that keeps us stuck in the past and unable to heal

Each of these manifest as energy in our bodies and one of the ways to relieve the pressure they create is to vent. Anger can be released by doing something physical like running or hitting a pillow. Pain and fear respond well to free form writing, talking it out, or release exercises.

But, there is an even greater opportunity available to you. 

What if. instead of venting to release it, you were able to take the energy of these emotions and literally transform it into something wonderful, beautiful, and positive?

You could:

  • Take your anger and channel it into art or turn it into a passion for helping others
  • Let your pain fuel your life mission or feed a commitment to compassion and love
  • Transform your fear energy into excitement that propels you toward your dreams

When energy presents itself, in whatever form, you get to choose how to use it.

Instead of letting it get TO YOU, find a way to use it for good and make it work FOR YOU. Turn it into something that feels both inspiring and meaningful.

When you do, your entire life can be transformed.

Related Posts:

The Simple Truth about Fear, Worry, and Anxiety

5 Bad Mood Busters that Will Help You Feel Better Fast

A Quick & Easy Way to Stop Out of Control Snacking

cheesecake stop snacking lifecoachlinda.com

I am not sure what got into me, but something surely did. It all started with a little chocolate heart in a store checkout line. That led to macaroni and cheese (lots of it) and a giant piece of cake that made my stomach hurt. The next day, I found myself eating an entire bag of Trader Joe’s Cheetos. My snacking was out of control, and I was feeling disconnected from my true self.

What I needed was an intervention and I needed one quickly. That’s when I decided to just STOP. This little method can really help prevent over eating and unconscious snacking. Continue reading

The Four Agreements – Simple & Powerful Tools for Life

Four Agreements Book

Every year about this time I revisit The Four Agreements by don Miguel Ruiz. Some years I even lead classes about them. They are simple, yet powerful tools that can help you:

  • Feel less reactive, hurt, or upset
  • Improve your relationships
  • Let go of limiting beliefs
  • Feel more peaceful and empowered
  • Become more grounded when facing the business of the holidays

Continue reading

The Power of Gratitude

gratitude grateful

For me, it shows up as a sense of being disconnected from myself and my higher power. I start to get mired in what is going wrong in my life or the world. Sometimes fantasies of impending doom or victim stories play through my mind. If I let it go too long, it can turn into depression.

I don’t know what to call it, but I think you might know what I am talking about.

What I do know is that when we start to fall into this trap of negativity, the quickest path back to our true selves includes a return to gratitude. Continue reading

How to Bring Balance to Your Relationship with Time

relationship with time clock

We can feel driven by our clocks, calendars, and the expectations of others. Even more so by the expectations we have of ourselves.

I don’t know about you, but when I get caught up in this full on “doing” mode, I find that I miss out on the little special moments of my days. When the day comes to an end I may have a long list of wins, but did I really live? Was I fully present with and enjoying what was before me?

There are times when driving ourselves feels good or necessary, but it shouldn’t be our only way of being.

I love achieving goals, but I also crave feeling peaceful and being in touch with magical moments that show up each day.

The following ideas can support you in bringing more balance to how you use time and a sense of grace to your days.

Focus On Your Priorities: It’s easy to get distracted by working hard on the wrong things. Get clear about your values and most meaningful goals. These are what you should be focusing on. If you are spending time on something that is not working, try something else. It’s important to be intentional about how you use your valuable time and life energy.

Watch Out for Time Wasters: For me, it can be checking email or Facebook and then letting something I see sidetrack me. Time wasters can be things you just fall into, people who don’t respect your time, or choices you make influenced by underlying fears and other things that want to keep you stuck. If you find yourself spending too much time off track, return your focus to your intended goal.

Do Little Things with Great Love: Stay present to whatever you are doing. Even mundane activities can bring joy when you focus on their meditative quality. Every moment and every task has it’s own beauty. When you slow down enough to appreciate them your work can be more fulfilling.

Develop the Art of Puttering: Every once in awhile, especially if I have been too caught up in getting things done, I set aside a day for puttering. Puttering is the art of flowing gracefully from one thing to another as they come up naturally. I follow my whims. And, I usually get more things done than I do on those days when I am pushing. At the end of the day I feel at peace and grateful for how much I accomplished without even trying.

Don’t Make It Hard: If I had a dime for every time I told myself something was going to be hard I would be rich. Most of the time the things I was resisting turned out to not be hard at all. I spent more time in the uncomfortable resistance than it took to actually get the thing done. Beware of thoughts or words that make things seem difficult or challenging and if you are really courageous, eliminate the word “hard” from your vocabulary completely.

Give Yourself a Break: Lately, my favorite break is Squirrel Time. I step away from my work to sit on the porch and feed squirrels. They amuse me, warm my heart, and connect me with nature. Other breaks might include going for a walk, stretching, having a snack, dancing, or reading. Science says that our minds and bodies are more efficient when we give them regular breaks. I know they work for me.

Feed Your Engine: You will be more efficient in how you use your time when your mind and body are able to operate at their fullest potential. This means that eating healthy, taking breaks, exercise, and all those common sense things you know you should do will help you be more effective in the long run.

Having a healthy relationship with time is all about balance. You can push yourself at times, but not all the time. It is important to allow space in your days to observe special moments and let your work flow with natural focus instead of forcing things. When you do, you will limit stress, feel more peace within, and still get things done. And that, is a good thing.

Related posts:

Slow Down to Get More Done

Simple Abundance

Choosing What Not To Do

How to Stay Calm When Stretching Your Comfort Zone

woman hiding - stepping out of comfort zone

I recently was a guest on a radio show and was a little nervous about it. So, I wrote up a few notes and set them in front of me as the interview started. What happened next was a little strange. My left eye became blurry and I couldn’t read. My notes were useless and I knew I had to “wing it”. I was definitely out of my comfort zone and fear started telling me to run.

When comfort zones are stretched, fear will start chattering about staying safe. “Don’t do that. They may not like you. It’s too big a risk. Why put yourself out there? I can keep you safe if you don’t do it.”

If we let that voice of fear control us, we stay stuck and play small. Without building new skills and meeting new people we miss out on the possibilities before us and will eventually regret not living our lives fully. 

Comfort zones are flexible and meant to grow. I knew this in that moment before my radio interview and even though I felt like running, I faced my fear, stayed calm, and did it anyway. Here is how you can too.

Recognize fear for what it is. Your fears want to keep you safe, but they are often over reactive. They were installed when you were younger and less able to take care of yourself. So, when you are afraid of meeting someone new the risk may be low, but your fear is still operating from the point of view of the 5 year old who was made fun of at school.

Fear doesn’t realize you have grown and developed new skills. It is a gut reaction that wants to protect you at all costs. Even if that protection hurts you in other ways.

Breathe deeply, and relax your face, neck, and shoulders.

Focus on other people or being of service. Take your mind off yourself and make the experience about the other people involved. How can you make them more comfortable? What can you ask them about themselves? How can you leave the situation better than it was when you entered it?  Fear is self-absorbed and focusing on other things can help shift you out of it.

Trust your inner self and speak from the heart.  This is what I did on that radio show when I couldn’t read my notes. I had to answer from my heart and experience.  By doing so, my interview was much more powerful than it would have been if I had used the notes. Trust yourself. You have everything you need inside of you.

Look for humor in the situation. When you look through an observer’s fly on the wall perspective things can seem quite amusing. Funny things happen when you stretch your comfort zone…

I remember being nervous about speaking before a group of people I didn’t know. When I went to the restroom before going on stage the water from the sink splashed over the front of my pants leaving very obvious water spots. For a moment, I just wanted to escape, but instead I went on stage and the first thing I did was make a joke about being attacked by their sink. It was a great ice breaker and the presentation went over well.

Humor can help you and the people around you feel lighter in stressful situations.

Make friends with your fear. Fear is not your enemy. It only wants what is best for you. It’s just a little over protective. So, have a conversation with it. Thank it for warning you. Let it know you’ve got things covered. And, ask it to help you in another way, like standing in the wings and cheering you on. You might be surprised how well it listens.

If fear is keeping you locked into your comfort zone and you would like the support of a professional life coach, I would love to talk to you. You can connect with me here.

Related Posts:

How to Tell the Difference Between Fear and Intuition

Fear and Anxiety: How to Make Friends with Your Lizard Brain

6 Proven Ways to Reduce Anxiety

Fear, Love, and Scaredy Cat Joey